Client Desire (intrinsic) questions
- If you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?
- If there is a small part of you that would like to be different, what does that part want?
- What kind of life do you eventually want for yourself and/or your family? - How does this (problem behaviour) fit into that life?
- What else?
Client Ability (confidence) questions?
- If you decided you wanted to change this, how would you go about it?
- If you decided you wanted to change this, how confident are you that you could succeed?
- If you decided you wanted to change this, what, if anything, might get in your way?
- When there have been occasions you were able to stop or decrease, how were you able to do this?
- What else?
Client Reason (Benefits of Change)
- If you can imagine yourself succeeding eventually, how might your life improve if you did?
- If you did want to change this, how might this benefit your family?
- What do you imagine people who succeed at this report about their lives after they’ve succeeded?
- What else?
Client Need (Adverse consequences)
- You’ve mentioned what you like about _____. On the other hand, what is the down side?
- If you were to continue in the same way and look down the road, what do you see?
- If you don’t change this, what’s at stake?
- What would your family say they worry about?
- Down the road, what would be some signs that would cause you to reconsider _______ ?
- What are the best and worst case scenarios about how this could play out?
- What else?
If the client begins spontaneously talking about change themes…
…you can extend this by making strategic reflections (“You’ve been growing more concerned about this”) as well as by asking for elaboration or examples. (“Tell me more.” “I’m curious about why you say that.” “Could you give me an example of what you mean?”).
For resistant clients…
…make it clear that this is just a hypothetical exploration: “I know you are saying you don’t want to go to a rehab program. I hear you loud and clear. Just so I know, though, please tell me what some of the possible benefits, if any, might be.”
If the client becomes argumentative or defensive, roll with resistance…
…do NOT argue!
When you have reached a logical ending point for this exploration…
remember to reinforce it with affirmations (“I appreciate your willingness to talk about this – it says a lot about you”) and a summary which highlights in an even-handed way their mixed feelings. Sequence the “pearls” from least to most threatening so as to highlight their ambivalence and let them feel that.
You feel really strongly about _____________ (reflection)…
…what about the other side, just for balance sake?
What do you like about ___________? (disarming question)…
On the other hand, what has been the not-so-good?
It seems like you are not ready to give this up right now…
When you look down the road, what would be some of the future signs that may cause you reconsider?
It seems like you don’t want to do this right now…
…If you did want to change this, what do you think your reasons would be?
If you decided you wanted to change this…
… how would you go about it? How confident are you that you could succeed if you wanted to?
You mentioned that ______ really gets on you about this…
What are his/her concerns? If she/he were here right now and I asked what worried him/her, how might they answer?
Examples of Evocative Open-Ended Questions
- What are the things that motivate you to want to make this change? (Desire)
- How might you go about it in order to succeed? (Ability)
- What are the three best reasons for you to do it? (Reasons)
- How important is it for you to make this change? (Need)
- So what do you think you’ll do? (Commitment)
Ask for Elaboration
- In what ways?
- How do you see this happening?
- What have you changed in the past that you can relate to this issue?
- What else?
Ask for Examples
- When was the last time that happened?
- Can you describe a specific example of when this happens?
- What else?
Looking Back
- How have things been better in the past?
- What past events can you recall when things were different?
Look Forward
- What may happen if things continue as they are (status quo)?
- If you were 100% successful in making the changes you want, what would be different?
- How would you like your life to be in the future?
Query Extremes
- What are the worst things that might happen if you don’t make this change?
- What are the best things that might happen if you don’t make this change?
Use Change Rulers
- On a scale where one is not at all important, and ten is extremely important, how important (need) is it to you to change _______?
-Follow up: Explain why you believe are you at a ___ and not (lower number)? - What might happen that could move you from ____ to a _____[higher #]?
- How much you want (desire),
- How confident you are that you could (ability),
- How committed are you to ____ (commitment).
Explore Goals and Values
- What do they want in life?
- What values are most important to you? (Using a values card sort can be helpful).
- How does this behaviour fit into your value system?
- What ways does ________ (the behaviour) conflict with your value system
Come Alongside
- Perhaps ______ is so important to you that you won’t give it up, no matter what the cost.
- It may not be the main area that you need to focus on in our work together.
Deep Reflection / Wake-up call question
What would have to happen to you, an indication for you, to start thinking about really changing your behaviour/attitude/xxx / to start thinking that this is really a concern for you?
