Ch8: Love

Question 1

Discuss the history of love

Answer 1

• centuries ago, love was not considered a part of marriage
• love was believed to be irrational and something that would destroy a marriage
• marriage was important economically, and led to children and the creation of alliances

Question 2

sternberg’s triangular theory of love

Answer 2

three components of love:
1. intimacy: feelings of warmth, understanding, trust, support, and sharing

2. passion: the physical arousal and desire, excitement, and need. often is sexual longing but any strong emotional need that is satisfied by a partner also fits
3. commitment: feelings of permanence, stability, and the devotion to a relationship and to work to maintain it
   - suggests that love is multi-faceted experience

Question 3

8 types of love from sternberg’s triangular theory

Answer 3

1. nonlove: no intimacy, passion, or commitment
2. liking: intimacy is high but passion and commitment are low
3. infatuation: passion is high but intimacy and commitment are low
4. empty love: commitment is high but passion and intimacy are low
5. romantic love: high intimacy and passion but low commitment
6. companionate love: high commitment and intimacy but low passion
7. fatuous love: high passion and commitment but low intimacy
8. consummate love: high passion, intimacy and commitment

Question 4

how does love change over time?

Answer 4

• relationships change or end for many reasons
• sternberg proposes that consummate love is the best type of love but it is rarely sustainable
• passion is the most variable component

Question 5

physiological aspects of love

Answer 5

• passion and intimacy are distinct experiences
• region of brain that regulates sexual desire is different from region that manages our feelings of attachment and commitment

Question 6

lust

Answer 6

• the sex drive
• regulated by sex hormones
• drives successful reproduction by providing motivation to mate with others

Question 7

attraction

Answer 7

• promotes pursuit of a particular preferred romantic partner
• drives pair-bonding
• regulated by neurotransmitter dopamine (feelings of reward + pleasure)
• dopamine is faster acting, producing a short term action

Question 8

attachment

Answer 8

• term to describe the feelings of comfort, security and connection to a partner
• drives companionate love
• regulated by neuropeptide oxytocin
• neuropeptides are slower acting, produce a prolong action

Question 9

Arousal and its effects on love

Answer 9

• arousal can be positive or negative, and both can fuel attraction
• when people are aroused, they tend to feel stronger feelings for the person near them –> adrenaline fuels love

Question 10

thoughts and love

Answer 10

• thoughts/beliefs/judgments are linked to love
• people who love each other think about one another in different ways than they think about other people
• people tend to view their partners in positive light
• love can be blind
• love can cause us to ignore alternatives
• we are more likely to have positive views of ourselves –> when your partner sees good aspects of you, you’re more likely to see them too (ie self-expansion model)

Question 11

Rubin’s love scale

Answer 11

• similar to sternberg’s triangular theory but includes caring instead of commitment
• argues that romantic love is multifaceted
  1. intimacy (same as sternberg)
  2. Dependence (passion)
  3. caring –> you do what you can to make your partner happy

Question 12

companionate love

Answer 12

• committed, deep friendship
• long-lasting satisfied relationships tend to include a lot of companionate love
• involves oxytocin (neuropeptide associated with attachment, long lasting impacts)

Question 13

compassionate love

Answer 13

• a type of love that combines the trust and understanding of intimacy with compassion and caring that involves empathy, selflessness, and sacrifice on behalf of the beloved
• not included in sternberg’s theory
• compassionate lovers tend to provide partners more support
• tend to share in pain and joy
• associated with more satisfaction and commitment overtime

Question 14

6 styles of loving from greek words

Answer 14

1. eros: erotic lovers influenced by physical appearance
2. ludus: love as an uncommitted game
3. storge: de-emphasize strong emotion and seek genuine friendships first
4. mania: demanding and possessive, obsession
5. agape: giving, altruistic, selfless, treats love as a duty
6. pragma: practical and pragmatic, partners are logically a good fit

Question 15

8 factors that influence love

Answer 15

1. culture
2. attachment
3. type of relationship
4. length of relationship
5. personal beliefs
6. age
7. experience
8. proximity/location

Question 16

why doesn’t romantic love last?

Answer 16

1. fantasy enhances romance
2. sheer novelty adds excitement and energy to new loves
3. arousal fades as time goes by