Jokes

Question 1

What’s a pirate’s favorite letter of the alphabet?

Answer 1

R

Question 2

Who is the queen of the pencil case?

Answer 2

The ruler

Question 3

What time do you go to the dentist?

Answer 3

Tooth-hurty

Question 4

What did the nose say to the finger?

Answer 4

Stop picking on me

Question 5

What did the left eye side of the right eye?

Answer 5

Between us something smells

Question 6

How do you make a tissue dance?

Answer 6

You put a little boogie on it 

Question 8

What time is it when the clock strikes 13?

Answer 8

Time to get a new clock

Question 9

How do we know that the ocean is friendly?

Answer 9

It waves

Question 10

Why did the kid cross the playground?

Answer 10

To get to the other slide

Question 11

What is a tornado’s favorite game to play?

Answer 11

Twister

Question 12

What falls in winter but never gets hurt

Answer 12

Snow

Question 13

How does the moon cut his hair?

Answer 13

Eclipse it

Question 14

What did the man say when he walked into a bar?

Answer 14

Ouch

Question 15

When does a joke become a dad joke?

Answer 15

When the punch line is a parent

Question 16

How do you stop an astronaut baby from crying?

Answer 16

 You rocket

Question 17

What has four wheels and flies

Answer 17

A garbage truck

Question 18

How are false teeth like stars?

Answer 18

They come out at night

Question 20

How do you throw a party in space

Answer 20

You planet

Question 21

What are the strongest days of the week?

Answer 21

Saturday and Sunday every other day is a weekday

Question 22

Why couldn’t the astronaut book a hotel on the Moon?

Answer 22

Because it was a full moon

Question 23

Why are robots never afraid?

Answer 23

They have nerves a steel

Question 24

Why are Shoemaker such kind people?

Answer 24

Because they have good souls

Question 25

Why did the kid bring a ladder to school?

Answer 25

Because she wanted to go to high school

Question 26

Why did the kid bury the battery?

Answer 26

Because it was dead

Question 27

What did one ocean say to another ocean when it asked the other out on a date?

Answer 27

Shore

Question 28

What do elves learn in school?

Answer 28

The elf-abet 

Question 29

Where do pencils go on vacation?

Answer 29

Pennsylvania

Question 30

What building in New York has the most stories?

Answer 30

The public library

Question 31

Why was the student’s report card wet?

Answer 31

Cause it was below c level

Question 32

What did one volcano say to the other?

Answer 32

I lava you

Question 33

Why didn’t the dog want to play football?

Answer 33

Because it was a boxer

Question 34

What musical instrument is found?

Answer 34

A tube of toothpaste

Question 35

What did the big flower say to the little Flower

Answer 35

Hi bud

Question 36

What’s brown has no legs, but has a head and tail

Answer 36

A penny 

Question 37

What did the book put on when it was cold?

Answer 37

A jacket

Question 38

Why did the man put his money in the freezer?

Answer 38

 he wanted cold, hard cash

Question 39

What do you call a funny mountain

Answer 39

Hill-arious

Question 40

What gets wet and wet the more it dries

Answer 40

A towel 

Question 41

What did one snowman say to another snowman?

Answer 41

You’re cool 

Question 42

Why is there a gate around cemeteries?

Answer 42

Because people are dying to get in

Question 43

What do you call an older snowman?

Answer 43

Water

Question 44

What stays in the corner yet can travel all over the world

Answer 44

A stamp

Question 45

What do lawyers wear to court?

Answer 45

Lawsuits

Question 46

What do planets like to read?

Answer 46

Comet books

Question 47

What has one head 1 foot and four legs

Answer 47

A bed 

Question 48

Why does Humpty Dumpty love autumn?

Answer 48

Cause he always has a great fall

Question 50

What word is always spelt wrong in the dictionary

Answer 50

Wrong

Question 51

What do snowman take when the sun gets too hot?

Answer 51

A chill pill

Question 52

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Answer 52

Because she was the best in her field 

Question 53

Where does a snowman keep his money?

Answer 53

In a snowbank

Question 54

What kind of award did the dentist receive?

Answer 54

A little plague

Question 55

What kind of ball doesn’t bounce?

Answer 55

A snowball

Question 56

Why was the little boy so cold?

Answer 56

Because it was Decembrrrrrrrrr

Question 57

What is the coldest country in the world?

Answer 57

Chile

Question 58

Why is dark spelled with a K and not a C

Answer 58

Because you can’t c in the dark

Question 59

What bow cannot be tied

Answer 59

A rainbow

Question 60

What is the best day to go to the beach

Answer 60

Sunday

Question 61

How do you make fire with two sticks?

Answer 61

Make sure they are a match

Question 62

What’s a balloon’s least favorite type of

Answer 62

Pop

Question 63

What did the picture say to the wall?

Answer 63

Do you mind if I hang around?

Question 64

What else did the picture say to the wall?

Answer 64

Help I’ve been framed

Question 65

What’s the best time to jump on a trampoline

Answer 65

Spring time

Question 66

Why did the girl go to bed with a pen?

Answer 66

To draw the curtains

Question 67

Why were they called the dark ages?

Answer 67

Cause there are lots of nights

Question 68

Who can shave six times a day and still have a beard

Answer 68

A barber

Question 69

Which rock group has four guys who can’t sing or play

Answer 69

Mount Rushmore

Question 70

What has only one eye, but still can’t see

Answer 70

A needle

Question 71

Do you want to hear a rough joke?

Answer 71

The first ones on the house

Question 72

Why was the broom late?

Answer 72

It over – swept