What are the 3 golden questions to ask myself when helping someone on my team?
Connecting with people
1. What are their intentions?
2. How do I help this person on my team feel clear and confident about owning the next steps?
3. What else can I do to help keep up progress, prioritize or solve the problem that’s holding us back?
When you feel your ‘role power’ is being challenged:
You’re feeling ….
The worst thing I can do…
Instead, reframe and say:
I can feel:
Frustrated that Im not being heard or listened to, and doubly frustrated that my role isn’t ‘respected’.
The worst thing I can do: Use role power
- Make it personal because I feel it’s personal. Focus on the problem in the moment.
- Overreact: It’s not about ending the war in this moment - you need an enduring relationship.
Instead, reframe and say:
- Solve the problem in the moment - and use it to further communicate expectations in order to grow a stronger relationship over time.
- Say: “Let’s step back and make sure we’re both talking about the same thing - what’s the heart of the problem?” (see creative guy about correcting people in the moment/ boundaries)
- Say: “Moving forward … when you do this, this happens. I need x. Can you do that?
If you are really passionate about something, how can you be effective in using it?
Don’t try to win a war in each discussion. Use a passionate instinct and influence smartly:
1. Elevate the conversation in the room: share my passion to inspire and challenge people to possibility
2. Ask the right questions to get people thinking for themselves rather than ramming your passion down their throats.
3. if this is a bigger vision, plant the right seeds to influence over time.
When faced with a decision…
Don’t delay on decisions that are easily reversed
Ensure people with a strong view are heard.
What is your motivation to lead
To create a modern brand that people love and to show how great brands drive business.
Where is your value:
Your role in the thinking
Feeling pressured that the quality of work is going to reflect badly on you
What is great brand marketing (brand management)
Feeling overwhelmed that you don’t know how to do something
Feeling under the pressure of deadlines
Common pressures that all managers feel
when you have impatience because you dont know the answer
wanting to get away from the feeling - the problem isn’t you, it’s a problem for the company to solve
Having impatience because you know the answer
wanting to jump ahead to what I think the answer - your role isn’t to know, its to make sure the person is clear for themselves
There’s a difference between having a different POV and not being heard
Don’t make it about the principle - make it about the problem you’re trying to resolve.
Why do i think i have the right to put my stress on someone else?
what if we’re on the same side, both feeling the stress
Use your instinct to tune into what their intentions are
Whats your relationship to the work?
how can you hold this all in your head?
You cant.. you need to study it and practice it until it becomes intuition. Like athletes who train on technical drills religiously - and then react with instinct when it comes to matches
What is your team philosophy?
Leading people who are better than me
Supporting others work
Leading domain experts
Decision rights
If youre not being set up for success…