Chapter 18

Question 1

4 dissatisfactions that can lead to the break up

Answer 1

• Dissatisfaction with Partner (you just dont care for the person like you used to )
• Dissatisfaction with the relationship (you’re unhappy with the state of the relationship)
• Dissatisfaction with others who form relationship network (you like your partner and relationship, but not others
• Inability to deal with strain imposed by circumstances (long distance)

Question 2

6 reasons for Relational Termination

Answer 2

• Skill Level of partners (people may not have the amount of work neccesary to maintain relationship)
• Boredom, disinterest
• major expecatation violated (cheating, lying)
• difficulty of maintenance (work schedules, long distance)
• conflict gets out of control, handled poorly
• better alternatives on the scene

Question 3

Termination

Answer 3

• may occur suddenly or people grow apart

- attraction changes

Question 4

Relational Inbalance

Answer 4

One person wants to terminate but the other doesnt

Question 5

Direct, Indirect, Other and Self Oriented

Answer 5

Direct-tell it how it is
Indirect-avoid person beat around the bush
Other Oriented-show concern for other person
Self Oriented-concerned with self

Question 6

5 Strategies for Breaking Up

Answer 6

• positive tone
• negative identity management (idea that staying together will cause more harm than good
• justification
• behavioral de escalation- indirect, avoid (nonverbal)
• -De escalation-direct, break off for awhile (verbal)

Question 7

3 ways we Distance ourselves from Another

Answer 7

Physically- try to put more space
Physchologially/ Emotionally -start to percieve the person differently
Communications Patterns-our communication changes ass we begin to distance ourselves

Question 8

Unproductive Communication Patterns

Answer 8

• hoping and praying to get the person back- escapist
• emotional upheaval-overwhlemed, feelings of lost control over emotions
• -alone and lonely
• rumination- focusing on symptoms of distress

Question 9

6 ways of improving communcation after break up

Answer 9

• keep busy
• think of future
• bolster your self esteem
• focus outward rather inward
• get help if you need it
• remember time heals