Mahler - Sub phase: Rapproachment
14–24 months
Child’s desire to be independent, is marked by fear of abandonment.
If this dynamic has not resolved, well, child will increase clingy or shunning behavior
Mahler - Stage 1
Normal autistic stage: 0-1months
Baby is entirely focused on itself – Mother is seen as part of the baby – with no separate existence
Goal at this point is equilibrium
Maslow’s hierarchy of needs
1st: survival stage-
Food, shelter, oxygen warmth. Without these things you’ll die!
2nd: safety needs
Financial security, health wellness safety from injury
3rd: social stage
Love, friendship, intimacy, forming relationships, getting into social groups
4th esteem stage
Self-respect, respect of others, self-confidence acknowledgment – you get through this stage by being competent at something such as work
5th: self actualization
Live in your purpose – answer your calling – become your best self – accepting the world for what it is
Only one percent of us consistently live in stage five
We work the stages from the bottom up.
Humanistic theory rise through all of this
Erikson - stage four
Industry versus inferiority: 6-12 years
Competency!
What am I good at?
We hope to an approval of others by showing ourselves to be competent, but the things we do. Peer group takes on greater importance, especially in terms of self-esteem.
Success :
Hard worker - ambitious mindset
Confident and resilient
More inclined to take on new challenges
Failure:
Don’t believe in themselves
Feel inferior
Social troubles
Academic difficulties
Depression, anxiety, self-esteem
May start – but failed to complete them
Mahler - Stage 2
Normal symbiotic stage: 1-5 months
Baby starts to make sense of Mother’s existence – they’re not as a separate
Physiological needs mixed with psychological desires. The Mother‘s availability and ability to meet basis upon which for future relationships are formed
Freud – fixations
If child is “stuck” (usually due to conflict or trauma) during any of the critical childhood stages, a fixation will occur.
Addiction, neurosis, depression – and other challenges showing up a later adult food, can’t be explained by fixation. Other examples:
Oral fixation :
Nail, biting, smoking, over eating, excessive talking
Anal fixation:
Extreme neatness overly controlling stubbornness
Phallic fixation:
Excessive vanity, narcissism difficulty with relationships
Genital fixation
Sluttiness or other forms of sexual dysfunction, inability to form meaningful relationships
Freud: structural theory - Id
Like the devil
Operates on the pleasure principle: getting our needs met in the most immediate pleasurable way possible. “I want this – so I’m going to do what I need to get it“
Primitive drive instinctual needs
Largely guided by unconscious mind
Impulsive behavior
Freud: structural theory – ego
“That’s me“
Reality: sits right in between Ed and super ego. This is our most rational practical self. It allows us to think, reason and make decisions.
Mediator between Ed and external reality
Moderate conflict between drives and internalized prohibitions
Judgment – grounded in reality
Controls impulses – regulate self-esteem – manages developmental challenges
Freud: structural theory – super ego
Morality – my angel – wants perfection
Operates on the morality principle strives to suppress the id – impulses for immediate gratification – and develop a system of morality
Internal cop – one’s conscience
Uses internal and external rewards/punishments to regulate the id and its impulses
Freud: libido
Psycho – sexual energy and the driving force behind our behavior
Erikson: stage five
Identity versus role confusion 12-18
Fidelity!
Who am I?
We search for a sense of self and personal identity through intense, exploration, values, beliefs, and goals.
We become more independent – see the future more in terms of career relationships, families, future home life, etc..
We want to belong and fit somewhere in society
Success:
Improved self-esteem
Strong stronger, interpersonal relationships
Increased creativity
Improved academic performance
Integrating early childhood identity with our current sense of self – along with all the physical/hormonal changes that come at this age. We develop a sense of fidelity – the ability to commit to others – even if they are different from us.
Failure
Confusion and uncertainty about role in society
More likely to engage in risky behavior
Still highly dependent on their parents not good at making friends
Fragile sense of self, lack of confidence, negatives image, unwillingness to express oneself. Role confusion – not knowing where to place themselves within a society or their circle of people. Taking on the identity of being bad, worthless person.
Mahler - Sub Phase - differentiation/hatching
Age 4-10 months
The shift from being internally focused to being externally focused
Baby is crawling now – and becomes more and more interested in knowing about the mother – how she looks smells, etc.
Piaget: stage one
Sensorimotor: birth-2 years
We want to explore the world using all five senses. We are curious about how everything feels, tastes, smells.
We “think“ manipulating the world around us.
Child has egocentric during this phase
Achievement needed for this phase:
Self recognition
Cause and effect
Concept of object permanence – even if a bucket is over a ball – the ball is still there. Might learn this by eight months of age.
By end of this phase, we should be advancing from crawling to running to the point we can explore the world even more
Erikson - stage 7
Generativity versus stagnation: 40-65
How can I contribute to the world?
Giving back to society by raising our children, being productive at work, mentoring, others, community involvement.
We develop a sense of being part of the bigger picture. We think of the generation coming up behind us. We strive to leave our mark on the world.
Success:
Purpose and fulfillment
Improved mental and physical health
Help to create a better world for others
Failure:
Lack of fulfillment
Sense of purposelessness
Feel disconnected from the world
By not contributing in positive ways, we become stagnant and unproductive. We feel disconnected from society.
Mahler: stage 3
Separation – individuation stage: 5-24 months
In separation, baby develops understanding of the boundaries of self – thereby viewing Mother as a separate individual.
Meanwhile, individuation marks the development of the sense of self. This manifests over four sub phases 
Mahler: Sub stage - object constancy
24+ months
If a child has been raised by a functional, present parent, they will develop a healthy sense of individuality – along with a healthy self concept and a degree of self-confidence
Erikson: stage one
Trust versus mistrust: birth – 1 1/2 years
Can I trust the people around me?
Goal: hope!
We must receive consistent, predictable, reliable care from primary caregiver. This gives us ability to develop trust and sense of security – even when being threatened.
Failure to get this feeling of fear, mistrust, anxiety. This can include long-term mistrust!
Success:
Healthy self-esteem
Able to build healthy relationship relationships
Values important of relationships
Receptive to forming connections with others
Failure:
Anxiety, depression, aggression
Mistrusting of people in personal/professional relationships
Fear of abandonment 
Piaget: stage three
Concrete operation stage: 7-11
It’s all about the logic!
Logical thinking develops – the abstract thinking is mostly out of reach
Easier to understand things if we can form a picture in our mind
We play games with rules
We can reverse our thinking 2+3 = 5; so therefore 5-3 = 2
We can understand the concept of conservation: pour juice from big cup to small cup – we can now understand that is the same amount of juice
We learn to be less egocentric – more able to put ourselves in someone else’s shoes
Achievement:
Advancing logical thought. Not always needing to visualize things to work them out. Example – we don’t need to use our fingers to count anymore.
Freud: psychosexual stage – oral
0-18 months
Gratification comes from stimulation with the mouth: sucking, tasting, breast-feeding, teething
Babies need to feel safe and secure – attachment is important
Babies become less dependent on caregivers for basic needs as they move through this stage
Freud: psychosocial stage – anal
18 months - 3 years
Gratification comes from anus and bladder
Primary focus comes from mastering toilet training
Extreme pressure from parents can lead to fixation: anal retentiveness. - a person who is obsessed with cleanliness, perfection and control
Extreme lack of attention by parents can lead to anal expulsiveness: a person who is overly messy and disorganized
Freud: psychosocial stage- phallic/Oedipal
3-6 years
Children begin to explore their bodies – with emphasis on genitals
Kids have a sexual attraction to the parent of the opposite sex – along with jealousy of the same sex parent: oedipus/electra complex
Kids will try to win over the bond between their parents – hoping to be the most important attachment in their parents lives
Freud: psychosexual stage – latency
6-11 years
Libido – sexual interest – is suppressed
More focused on school, hobbies, and friends
Same sex friends most common
Role models and interests emerge from outside the family
Freud: psychosocial stage – genital
12 - death
Onset of puberty is different for everyone
Become more compassionate or focused on others – rather than just oneself
Libido kicks in – start to engage in physical/emotional intimate relationships
Everyone’s strives for long-term, healthy relationship patterns
Piaget: stage two
Pre operational stage: 2-7
It’s all about symbols!
Learn to speak – learn to use symbols to represent letter, letters, numbers, notes, images, etc.
Pretend play happens at the stage
We continue to be egocentric in this phase
We think of objects (toys etc) as having thoughts and feelings. Imaginary friends are possible.
We proceed the world how it looks – but not how it actually is.
Achievement for this phase:
Symbolic thought. Meaning can be assigned to words, numbers objects.