Commitment

Question 1

What is commitment?

Answer 1

Intention to maintain a relationship over time

Us with a future

The choice to give up other choices

Most studied constructs in relationship science

Question 2

What are the two elements of commitment?

Answer 2

Dedication - the “want to” in commitment
Desire to share the future together, having a couple identity, love, their good looks, quirky sense of humor, all the forces that increase the desire to maintain a relationship

Constraint - the “have to” in commitment
Family and friends expect us to stay together, I’ve invested a lot in this relationship that would be lost, we have a pet and lease together, ending it would be so hard, all the forces that make it more difficult to end a relationship

Question 3

What are the different types of constraints?

Answer 3

Perceived constraints: internal or external forces that encourage partners to stay together

Material constraints: specific, tangible resources couples share

Felt constraint: sense of feeling trapped in a relationship. This is the only aspect of constraint that predicts relationship dissolution, and it also predicts being in a relationship with physical violence

Question 4

The sense that you have made substantial investments that would be lost, ending a relationship would be difficult, lacking better alternatives, what type of constraint is this?

Answer 4

Perceived constraint

Question 5

Having a lease, sharing debt, buying furniture, having a pet, planning for a future vacation, what type of constraint is this?

Answer 5

Material constraint

Question 6

I would leave my partner if it wasn’t so difficult to do so. What type of constraint is this?

Answer 6

Felt constraint

Question 7

What are the popular notions about dedication and constraint?

Answer 7

Dedication is good

Constraint is bad. However, constraints don’t feel constraining if we are happy with the path we are on. Constraints are an inevitable part of life

Question 8

What is the relationship between dedication and constraints?

Answer 8

Dedication is what gets us to commit

Constraints keep us there

Question 9

What does commitment predict? What is the experiment tied to this?

Answer 9

Strongly predicted relationship quality

One study employed machine learning to analyze 43 longitudinal datasets that included more than 11 000 couples

Analysis used AI to comb through variables in each dataset to learn which most robust predicted relationship quality

Commitment was the most successful predictor of quality

Another study analyzed data from 1184 individuals in serious but unmarried relationships

Followed for 8 months, 26% broke up

Higher dedication and higher constraints predicted decreased likelihood of breaking up

Results held when accounting for whether they lived with the partner or had a child together, education, income, race, relationship length, gender

Question 10

Does commitment change behaviour in relationships?

Answer 10

Yes

The presence of commitment invites a transformation of motivation

A future orientation prompts us to act in ways that do not necessarily provide immediate benefits for the long term health of the partnership

Question 11

What is a caveat to sacrifice’s mutual cyclic growth process

Answer 11

Must be mutual and undertaken for the genuine benefit of the partner

Question 12

What is inertia theory?

Answer 12

Human lives have a tendency to continue alone the path we are on

In a relationship, this involves becoming increasingly intertwined in one another’s lives

Question 13

What is sacrifice?

Answer 13

Outgrowth of commitment

Sacrifice in one partner prompts increased trust and commitment in other partner, increasing willingness to sacrifice in both

Mutual cyclic growth cycle

Another robust predictor of relationship quality

Question 14

What does constraints do on any path?

Answer 14

Increase in relationships and life

This happens regardless of our intentions

As constraints accrue, alternate paths become more distant

Question 15

What does dedication do on any path?

Answer 15

Might increase, but no guarantee

Question 16

Which develops first, constraints or dedication?

Answer 16

Substantial constraints can develop before dedication

Question 17

What is a high risk sequence for commitment?

Answer 17

Sliding

Transition (cohabitation, pregnancy, marriage)

Inertia and constraint (social, relational, moral, health)

Information (risks, mutual? Fit?)

Question 18

The process of making decision allows…

Answer 18

For dedication to grow

Question 19

What is the deal with sliding?

Answer 19

You lose options without making a choice

Question 20

What is healthy commitment?

Answer 20

High likelihood of things working out

High amount of dedication along with the inevitable constraints

Question 21

Why is deciding important?

Answer 21

Deciding increases the likelihood of healthy commitments

Key evidence in support of inertia theory involves following couples across transitions (such as cohabitation)

When a clear commitment precedes the transition (marriage, engagement), post transition couple relationship are significantly higher quality

Question 22

What is a low risk sequence of commitment?

Answer 22

Information (is this safe? Mutual?)

Decision (choose, give up other options)

Transition (cohabitation, pregnancy, marriage)

Inertia and constraint (social, relational, moral, health)

Question 23

Are commitments high or low risk?

Answer 23

High risk. High responsibility and high intentionality leads to healthy commitment